Sunday, April 26, 2009

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19. Leisure Suit Larry 6 - Shape Up or Ship out. 1993.



I said before in this string of articles that Quest of Glory 2 was the greatest game in the Quest series. Alot of people consider Leisure suit Larry to be apart of the Quest series (like Police Quest, Space Quest) however it isn't because it doesn't have quest in the title...see.

Anyway, where would we be without Larry... most likely I would have a symbol of peace attached to the back of my car instead of lodged inside my anus (that offended even me). I shudder at the thought.

My first experience with Larry was at my neighbours house as a kid. We struggled to get past the age checker (which, in hindsight was actually the best part of the game) to get access to the smut filled game. How we laughed when Larry was called a pervert by the Indian shopkeeper, how we cried when Larry died of VD and how we cheered when Larry was reassembled and returned to the surface in a weird tribute to Star Wars.

The neighbour I was talking about was a girl who was few years older than me and during playing through the game was hinting at engaging in some sexual exploration of our own, however I was (thankfully... the bitch ugly.) too young to realize what the fuck was going on and ended up just giving her a Chinese burn when she put her hand on my leg.

Serves you right scag. You got to pay fo' this shit.

Anyway, number six gets the choice mention today. I remember going over to Griffin's house (who also tried some sexual advances... and succeeded hmmmmm.... just kidding.) and he had the LSL collection featuring all six games and some bonus crap noone cared about. That night I remember powering through LSL2 with friends coming up every ten minutes asking if you could have sex with whatever female was on the screen. Good times... Good times.

The first three were considered to be the golden Larrys. The fourth was never released because someone on the Sierra staff lost the discs with the source code on it (which is funny) and so they went straight to releasing number 5. Passionate Patty which was rather forgettable. Then number six came out. Reviews were saying that Larry had overstayed his welcome, that it was less about a sleezebag and more about Al Lowe parodying himself... and that made it three times funnier. Come on, any adventure game with a option to unzip on every screen has to be good.

Since then Leisure Suit Larry 7 has come out which is famous for having a dildo hidden in every screen. After that Leisure suit Larry Magna Cum Laude came out which focused on Larry's nephew Jim... or something... it didn't matter anyway as the point was to look at bouncing boobs. What made this game both famous and banned in Australia was that when you talked to women a mini game r-type shoot em up featuring a sperm as the player's ship would come up and depending on how well you did in the game would translate to how well you talked the talk to the ladies.

Just like in real life.

I've seriously got to import this game.

Awesome Character Profile:

Larry

If the previous characters in the Awesome Character Profile section were kings of awesome then Larry is some kind of Awesome God... with Chlamydia.
While he emerged onto the scene composed of about sixteen pixels and four colours, the later games expanded on this primordial template to create the legend we see today. As the years went on he became balder, fatter and creepier and that's why we loved him. Though he swung with all his might he was never able to sink one in the hole 0.O which made him the people's champion and my personal savior, for in truth he was the only character in the world getting less than me.

18. Devil May Cry 3. PS2.



As mentioned before this game is pretty much Viewtiful Joe in 3d. Another one of those Zone games, DMC was originally going to be Resident Evil 4 but when it became obvious that the game was so radically different it became it's own series.

The Action/Adventure genre today is split between three titans, Devil May Cry, God of War and Ninja Gaiden. Alot of people argue that God Of War is THE game of the genre because of it's huge boss battles and visceral gameplay however I personally prefer DMC3 as it has one thing up on God of War. That thing is style. Where GOW focuses on brutal kills DMC focuses on over the top combat and awesome weapons. Throw an enemy into the air, then run up a wall slicing him while your at it, when he hits the ground ride his corpse down some stairs while emptying fifty clips into the air. Brilliant.


Awesome Character Profile

Virgil

DMC3 also brought Dante's brother and rival Virgil into the foreground. Basically a quite blue version of Dante, a full retail priced special edition was released that allowed you to play through as this katana wielding badass. Obviously Capcom knew they had a winner on their hands.


17.Shadow Hearts: Covenant. PS2. 2004.

This pretty much represents my love of console JRPGs the best. Compared to all other RPGs though it stands out as an oddity and that's what made it so great. First of all the game was set in an alternate timeline during World War one which is practically unheard of in the genre. Second the game featured some of the most disturbing creatures ever conceived by man, including a penis monster, never saw Cloud fight one of those. Top of it all off with a quirky sense of humour and an upgrade system that REQUIRED you to procure gay porn and you have a winner in my book.

One of the main characters was a Gay wrestler who had contracted vampirism and was also a superhero.

Shadow Hearts: Covenant is the second in the Shadow Hearts series and focuses on protagonist Yuri who is aimlessly wandering the earth after the death of his soul mate. He teams up with a bizarre cast of characters after being targeted by the church as a heretic with demonic powers. Through the game you'll actually go on two separate adventures in both Europe and Japan. The game truly feels like it has it's own sequel contained within the game with each part clocking in at roughly forty hours.

What makes Shadow Hearts is the diversity of the characters. Each character has their own separate way of leveling up their abilities. Your faithful canine has to develop his abilities by entering into bouts with other wolves and dogs ranging from a wolf possessed by demons to a Space Pooch who communicates only in emoticons. This brilliant system keeps the player interested and engaged the whole way through and believe me, it is hard to return to the old grind method of leveling afterwards.

Awesome Character Profile:

Grand Papillion.

H
ow can you go wrong with a gay, wrestling, vampire superhero? Seriously, how???


Thursday, April 23, 2009

Playing

Lost Odyssey
Pros:
Kaim’s Character,
Numera
1000 years stories
Date Rape
Uematsu

Cons:
Cooke’s voice
No time skip.

Sam & Max


News, Releases

Square Enix Took over Edios
Super Robot Taisen Endless Frontier (monolith)
Marvel Vs Capcom Hinted

Indie

New Game: D-Pad Hero

Free game: The Suffering

Discussion

Prediction

R. Gaming

Cho Aniki

Bargain:

Gametraders

Addition: SMPS

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

That's like soooo last gen.

22.Okami. PS2/Wii 2006

The best way to describe Okami is as a combination of Kingdom Hearts and Zelda set in a mystical Japan. Also you're a wolf. *cough*
As a corporeal incarnation of the God of Creation it is your task to make the people believe in you once again by performing miracles to gain faith from your followers.
While the Zelda esque adventure should be a selling point by itself, Okami also throws in an interesting mechanic where at any time you can collapse the world into a 2d drawing and then draw ontop of this drawing, adding devices into the game. For example, early in the piece an old woman cannot do her washing because she ain't got no line going on, so you collapse to 2d, draw in a line and then the world is saved. Thrilling stuff, no?

Obviously as time goes on the standard of the miracles increase until it culminates in an apocalyptic battle of galactic proportions. ZOMG Spoilerz!!!

Production values are through the roof. While the game was overlooked there was obviously a lot of green spent on the art style, world design and writing. Every single character you encounter seems to have a deep personality that is excellently conveyed, even if they only have one or two lines. The game has all the tropes I love, the false ending (where the game makes you think you've finished but then you discover an even greater evil), rival battles and humour. God is there a lot of humour in this and, for the most part, it is laugh out loud funny.

Most reviewers critiqued the game for being too long clocking in at one and a half times longer than Twilight Princess... which was no slouch in this area either, even though the game remained fantastic throughout with little to no padding. Stupidly enough the same people who said it was too long are now asking for a sequel.

Clover Studios have now collapsed and moved onto not as great things, so the chances of seeing an Okami 2 is very slim. On top of that the creator stated that he would only do an Okami 2 if he thought something fantastic could be added. Okami was designed to be self contained with every part of it's history fleshed out and every question answered, which they were... except the ending which, while insane and ridiculous, was cool and satisfying anyway.


Awesome Character Profile:

Issun
.

A lazy wandering artist the size of an ant, Issun is pretty much as worthless a character that ever existed. Despite his lower social status however he has no qualms grabbing the ample bazoogas of mother nature, wise mouthing off at demonic gods and bossing around the God of Creation.
Issun is basically a perverted freeloading flea. He has much to teach us.



21.Guilty Gear X2 #Reloaded. PS2/Arcade/Xbox 2002.





Even with the emergence on MUGEN where you can hypothetically put every character from GG against those from capcom, this still stands as an excellent release. This game wasn't just a good fighter, it was a release that rivaled AAA games in terms of length and production values.

Three separate story modes for each character. A mission mode full of FUCKING hard missions. Unlockable EX and EX2 versions of each character that would change every move (think Ken, Dan, Sakura etc).

Then you look at the game, at the time it was the only fighter that had HiRes sprites and still looks better than most of the 2d fighters that came after.

The graphics weren't the main draw though, the main draw was the gameplay.

GG took all the conventions of fighting games and threw them out the window. Instead of your same old Ryu fireballs, characters were given extremely complex moves that could be strategically used to rack up insane combos. Mines and defensive moves could be used to force your rival to fight in a particular way thus giving you the advantage. The game even contained special moves that could be countered by little platforming segments.

Truly, when all the moves and ideas behind the game were mastered it became more like playing a frantic game of chess than a regular fighter.


After playing the kings of the field: Street Fighter 3, Mark of the Wolves, King of Fighters. I can safely say that only one other comes close.

Most importantly however, transcending the brilliance of the gameplay and the majesty of the design is the fact that there is a character with a bag on his head... ON HIS HEAD... HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.

Suck my balls.


Awesome Character Profile:

Dizzy

The character design in this game is truly phenomenal and really any character could be on the list, from Bag head (Faust), to the creepy possessed Zappa to the unfortunately named Sol Badguy and his Rival Ky. One of the best however is Dizzy.

Dizzy is really three characters in one, the girl seems to be lost, confused and scantily clad (of course) She has two wings, the right is an embodiment of a demon and the left an incarnation of an angel. Together they let her release the powers of Heaven and Hell on any rival that crosses her path.

Though utterly destructive and badass, the two wings will occasionally bicker with one and other, and that's just cool.


20.Viewtiful Joe. Da cube. 2003.

Represent.

This is one of those games that you have your personal favourite of the genre. And the genre here is something I'd like to coin as 'Zone Games'. Forget what actually is happening in the game, this is a game where your reflexes have to be so finely tune that you actually have to merge with the controller.

Everyone has their own (Bubble Bobble, Bust A Move, Peggle and Tetris come to mind). These are games that take over your lives, your higher cognitive functions are suspended as the extra split second the information takes to transmit to the rest of your brain could cost you your life.

So you operate on instinctual automation instead. When you are talking to your significant other you start going into withdrawal. While you are having lunch your fingers twitch and mimic hitting A Y and X. People walking down the street are all out to get you... to stop you from playing... and then back home into your dimly lit abode... come on come on ... boot up already... load game.... come on... fucking loading scre.....ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh feel the calm.

It's about five dollars now too, go get it.

Awesome Character Profile:

Alastor

Existing for no reason other than to be Joe's Rival, Alastor is everything that is cool about Joe magnified to the twentieth power. Alastor is actually the name of Dante's sword in Devil May Cry and as VJ basically plays like Devil May Cry in 2d and was designed by a lot of the same staff, the director thought it was appropriate that there was some representation of DMC in the game.

While serving as a pretty awesome rival, Alastor, utilizing a completely different play style, moveset and storyline, is playable if you defeat the game on V-rated (Good luck with that, Six years on and I haven't done it.) giving hardcore players a reason to relive the game over and over again.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

24-22 Edited to conform.

24.Jagged Alliance 2. PC 1999.

Released in the golden year of 1999, Jagged alliance 2 is one of a kind... seriously, no one has ever made a game like this. It could be described as a turn based Rainbow Six/Sims 2 game, the game focused on leading a group of mercs through a war torn country. The Mercs all had unique personalities and would form relationships between one another and comment on how everything was progressing. If a friend died they might leave the team while if their nemesis croaked it their efficiency would improve. Determining which team would work well together was a critical part of the game strategy.

When it came to combat nearly everything you could think of was implemented into gameplay. Ammo conservation, bleeding factors and environment destruction were all implemented in a game that is now hitting it's tenth year. Which makes it 896 in human years, so it is surprising how the old bugger can get busy like the best of them.

You could also tackle overthrowing the country in whatever way you felt worked. After being dropped at a static insertion point it was pretty much up to you how you wanted to proceed. You could destroy ammo dumps to disadvantage enemies. Cut off their supply lines to gain more income, take over towns to make the populace revolt, take over airports to open up new insertion points, it goes on.

It wasn't completely perfect however, the game featured an optional scifi mode that will good in the sense that it added different enemy types, really didn't fit with the rest of the game. Also, Until recently the game and it's excellent but brutal expansion pack was reasonably difficult to find. With the rise of sites like Good Old Games however, it has become more available. A DS port of the original reportedly is coming out in may though it has been delayed several times before.

Jagged Alliance took up weeks of my time and is replayable as hell. I booted it up today and became addicted once again. A true classic. The graphics are a little dated by today's standards but fans of games like X-com and even Full Spectrum Warrior and the Swat series should definitely check it out.

Awesome Character Expose:

There was a German character that kept saying 'Shizer', you can't teach that.

Next up: The only game on this list set in Arabia


23.Quest for Glory II: Trial By Fire. PC. 1990.



Quest for glory 2 is officially now the ugliest game in the series (as the first was remade) however it remains my favourite. It was ugly even when it came out I still remember a friend trying to convince me to start a petition to get this game remade. Graphics aside it was quite fabulous and had a quirky sense of humour. While it is from one of the lesser known series, of all the Quest games this is probably the best... though the original space quest is a serious contender.

Newcomers to the game will note that the game seems to play like Sierra's other early adventure games such as Police Quest, King's Quest and the legendary Leisure Suit Larry... which probably should have made this list but I didn't want people to say:


The major difference is that there is an a small RPG factor included within the game. You can choose from three different characters or import your character from the original game, which is pretty cool for the time it was produced in. As a result there are usually three different ways to tackle each situation which means you are not stuck, as often, trying to work out what insanely unobvious thing the developers want you to do (King's Quest V & VI, I'm looking at you).

The story follows the hero as he travels through the mystical lands of the the middle east, Djinn and magic carpets flood the land etc etc. The story is pretty predictable but at the time it was a huge contrast to all the other fantasy games which were usually confined exclusively the medieval Europe inspired locales.

There is a decent sense of humour in the game, sure it is not up to the level of humour in Space Quest IV where you travel in time through the different games in the series and the world was destroyed by a virus contained on a pirated copy of leisure suit larry... that's awesome, but it is still serviceable.

Again, QFG2 is graphically dated today, it was dated the day it came out, though while it has never been officially remade, fans have taken it upon themselves to completely recreate the game in a new engine, so head over here for some of the best freeware money can not buy.

Awesome Character Expose:

A
side from the main character there are few characters in this game who are actually memorable. The text based dialogue of the narrator probably carries the most wit of the entire game so I guess he gets the AwesomeLarsen thumbs up for the day. The designers themselves deserve an award for allowing you to kill yourself via an opium pipe. Going out like a rockstar.

Next up: The Final Frontier.

22.Freespace 2 PC. 1999.


The second game on the list to come from the golden year 1999. Freespace 2 brought atmosphere like nothing else. Small space flight fighters have never come close since, in fact, no one has really released one since... hmmm. Anyway this game was way ahead of it's time. Being the leader of a small squad, you were thrust into a war that your side was losing from, badly. This was one of the first games where it truly felt that what you were doing was inconsequential. No bad arse one man save the world and throw money at hookers here, you were fucked from the get go, pure and simple.

Principle Skinner described it best: 'They promised me a parade, instead they spat on me'

It was common to see and hear your comrades go down in balls of flame and as massive capital ships tore into each other you really felt like you were just annoying mosquito. I still remember being in shock when your home base (where you had to land every mission) was blown to fuck and I kept thinking I had failed the mission.

There were spoilers in that last paragraph by the way.

On top of a brilliant singleplayer campaign Freespace had some excellent multiplayer, Friends would call me up on the eve of a major assessment and convince me to play just one more game. Of course I did which goes a long way to explaining why I live in a syringe filled gutter today.

At times we even had a few other people join in, even though the game had been out for several years. I recall one guy taking it way to seriously and actually referring to us as his superiors and requesting permission to fire.

What a fag.

Oh wait, it was me.*

Freespace 2 still holds up ten years on, mainly because nothing of note has been released since then but also because the graphics were revolutionary for the time and since then, mods have been released to update the game to today's standards.

The developers of the game have moved on to developing, surprisingly, the Saint's Row series. While they may have gone, their legacy lives on with custom campaigns being released almost monthly... that sounds less impressive than it is as Starcraft has forty two mods released per nanosecond and there are TWO cable channels dedicated to it in South Korea (bless them) but compared to the majority of games it's age, Freespace 2's mod community is going fairly strong.


*actually wasn't but.

Awesome Character Expose:

The Lucifer.

While this behemoth played a much larger role in the original game, the Lucifer was still mentioned in FS2. Initially it was a Capital ship that could decimate planets within seconds. The vessel was three times the size of anything else in the game and was immune to all attacks.

In the second game the starship existed solely for comparison purposes with the designers of the game saying "You thought the Lucifer was huge?? Well the standard new ships you'll be fighting are 14x the size!'. What was cool however is that this vessel that nearly destroyed humanity in the first game turned out just to a probe from this larger amarda. It took everything Earth had to destory this demon, can they possibly win against a force even more powerful and epic?


The answer is yes.

Sorry, I just totally spoiled the ending for you.

Next Up: Cel-Shaded Twilight Princess.

Monday, April 13, 2009

AwesomeLarsen's Top 25 Games

The Internet is a list based place, on every gaming forum, hundreds of people post lists of their favourite in a desperate attempt to have their choices approved by others. It is almost pitiful.
As we all know however, no one seeks approval more than AwesomeLarsen so for the next twenty five days, be mildly entertained by AL's Top 25 games!
I was going to put an 'ever' on the end but that tends to imply that it is a definitive list that will not be altered by either games that will come out in the future or games from the past I haven't played yet. 'Top 25 games' by itself sounds a little bland though, if you want to spice it up you can add an 'Eva!!!!' or 'Of all time!!!!!!!' onto the end in your mind, I won't stop you.
The only rule is that there can only be one game per series. This article also was totally not posted several years ago on another blog.
Now enter the Garden of Madness!

25. Shining Force 1&2. Mega Drive. 1994


Already breaking one of my own rules, these games compliment each other so they both need a mention. One of the only games to seemlessly mix tactical strategy with a roleplaying storyline and world exploration. Shining Force was fun both on the field and in the town. Field battles that felt like they took minutes would consume hours of your time. The battles pitted centaurs against machines, swordsmen against werewolves, and everyone against this weird mini octopus thing called 'Domingo'.
After those hours had flown by you would spend the rest of your time wandering around the towns of the world interacting with it's wacky denizens. I love that word.
Shining Force 2 (and 1&3) was one of the few strategy role playing games (SRPGs) in history where you could actually wander around the world between battles (like a regular RPG). It was a brilliant mechanic that surprisingly has only been emulated once or twice in the fifteen years since it's release, and it was emulated poorly.
Unfortunately the Shining Force series is owned by Sega who actively go out of their way to rape their classic franchises. While a new Shining Force is released every two years, the new games aren't even in the same genre as the originals.
Recently a DS game based on the originals was released but it has yet to be confirmed for release outside Japan. Another new game is slated to be announced next Tuesday but I wouldn't get your hopes up, like every new Sonic game, it most likely will just be more shit to add to the pile.

For those of you wanting to get your hands on this gem you can either download it on the virtual console or pick up the Ultimate Genesis Collection (or whatever it is called in your region) and get the first two games in the series.



Awesome Character Expose:
Kane (Shining Force)



Shining Force, in my mind anyway, was my first exposure to cool looking anime characters and the first badass anime dude I ever saw was Kane. While pretty much every Japanese RPG created these days has a badass anime dude, this was not always the case... or maybe it was... point is Kane rulezes.

You first meet Kane after he wipes out your home town of Guardania (props to me for remembering it) he does his ol' bad guy chuckle, kills the king as well as your mentor in front of your eyes then pisses off. You spend the game searching for him and eventually bust a cap in his ass. Later you find out that SPOILERS: Kane is actually your brother who was brainwashed by an even eviler dude (even more so than Skeletor) and controlled by the mask he wears in the above pic.

Sure it is cliched as a fox sitcom now but back then it was cool.


Like all Japanese badasses he flickers a few times then disappears... which presumably means he died.
END SPOILERS

Over the years people have likened Kain to David Bowie. The resemblance was seen as a joke until Shining Force II was released and the new main characters default name was 'Bowie'. Coincidence or hi-tech MI-5 plot? You decide.



Thank you your dukeness.

Stay tuned for number 24.